Katya Grokhovsky, video still, senseless, 2008So let me PAUSE, right here.
I have decided not to dwell on the Best off 2010.
It has all been, THE Best.
I take the packaged year, all of it neatly wrapped up into the softest layers of the tulles of memories: still fresh and burning, the subtle, smoky colors of unseen, wished for romantic sunsets and anxious deadline-induced sleepless nights, covered in the new knowledge of unknown, yet confident, tomorrowness, I put it gently away into the pocket of my Experience . Right now, Yesterday. The blonde wigs, the dancing till dawn, the whiskeys on the rocks, the frustrations and joys, the failures and successes, the slow dancing in the lobby of Palmer House Hilton, the dresses, the American Flag, the Ukrainian dancing as a boy, the travels, physical and metaphorical, hours of crap TV to numb the over-active mind, the endless reading lists to last lifetimes, the heated debates, the arguments, the nervous smoking, the stress and yes, new hairs, devoid of color. grey. I kiss.
And so, as of NOW, I have 3 months left of GRAduate School and this blog. Forgive the sentimentality and tears, held back behind this screen, for the Tears, they will be streaming. Oh, come theeeeee, Come oh, May.
There will be, of course, amazingnessss in Future, for MISS Future is a Queen, always, ever shiny, sparkling and shimmering in the oh-so bright distance. I believe. For MAster, Master, I am the MAster, I can do.....
What awaits? As any Graduate Student worth her/his salt, I have no clue. MAster plan?
Yes, many in the stew. Yet. I rest . I pause. Processing the ingredients.........
Trusting my own gut instinct, throughout most of this time, I currently take pleasure in the fact that I am now, in the MFA club. What the hell does it mean? Stakes are raised and they are high and some of us are perched onto them. Money spent, knowledge earned, dark competitive bruises and post-critique scars aquired and healed. Graduate Family. For my life.
As I arrive in Chicago O'Hare Airport from LA, at midnight, one cold weekday, last week, I am greeted by a good looking: " what's up baby, welcome to Chi", I whisper " home..." and smile shyly back, answering I am excellent!!!!
Shall we make some ART?
Let me come out of it and as I stand , ambitiously creatively naked in front of you I proudly SAY this:
I love ART.
For what it's worth.
ok, melting my own icy heart with the melodies of listened- to- in- the- name- of- research of hundreds of slow songs , I ALSO say, in the words of those we know well,
LOVE> is ALL you Need
r.i.p 2010
